Bollywood hungama

I took my parents to see a movie and all that was playing was 'What's ur rashee' (sheeeeee) 'Dil bole hadippa' (hmmmmm...whatever). Mum refused to see hadippa. Dad said, " rasheeee... eeeeee" So I used my veto and said, we go for the movie that starts first. Hadipppaaa!!! The movie was tolerable, very predictable, but what was left behind in my mind was this very silly song where Rani Mukherjee (a town girl) tells Shaheed Kapoor (from England) " disco wale khisko, chal desi beat bajaa!" lolz...lolz...when heard it first, I said this is atrocious! God! On second thoughts, I found it very apt (to the situation, where she was having a go at Shaheed for being 'vilaati munda' as she called it). Really crazy! Disco wale khisko??? lolz....Bollywood=leave your brains behind. Call it entertainment!

Out of context: Ganpati procession

I was driving through Sion and saw a procession for the Navratri pooja, fully eqipped with band-baajas, bhopus (loudspeakers), lights, trucks and peple decked up. Somehow my attention was drawn towards the familiar tune that was playing while the people were dancing. No, it wasn't our favorite Ganpati Nashik-dhol beat, but guess what? Guess what?

It was 'jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way'!!!!!!!!!

The golden leaf

My Maharashtrian maid very sweetly came and gave me a small heart-shaped leaf today and we wished each other 'Happy Dasshera'. After pulling her leg on the leaf not being made of real gold, I asked her what to do with it, she said its supposed to be lucky so keep it in your wallet. I hope to get loads of money now! Certain things are so symbolic. I absolutely love these tiny gestures.

Cloud 9

An identity for Cloud 9

ice ice baby!

Somebody please stop me from eating ice- creams! I know cold kills cold, but 3 ice-creams in 24 hours has left me croaking like a frog! Atishooo!!

Hokie - pokie

With so many ice- cream parlours in town, the ice-cream brands really have to work hard with constant innovation and availability of choice.

Gelato was a big hit when it first came- they had some 15 odd flavours, which soon became passe, coz they didn't keep up with it.

Next came Naturals, which was awesome- Natural ice- cream! Wow!! People went mad!

But even after a year (or two) they still have the same ice- creams they had before, without many noticeable additions. I've had most of the ice creams from Natural's- right from tender coconut to the melon to the lemon.

People want something new every time you go to a place! So it was one of those days when I just wanted to have an ice-cream! Must have. None of these places tempted me so I decided to go to Hokey Pokey to have something 'different'. I've been there before, but not enough to have eaten every ice-cream available there...ummm which one should I have? Manic Monkey? Monkey Business? Cookie Dough? I finally settled for the Apple crumble pie ice-cream, coz I thought, Apple pie? In an ice-cream? Strange. Sure enough, they mixed some 'French Vanilla' with roasted almonds, chocolate cookie and some form of apple (that goes into the pie). Was awesome!

What's more, it tasted nicer with a waffle cane with chocolate edges on the inside! I think this might just be my new ice-cream parlour of the month- till I get fed up of it!

English bloopers

An excerpt from a conversation at work on an afternoon:

Spelling struggler 1:         What is the spelling of neighbour? Neighbour or neighbor?
Spelling struggler 2:         Neighbour is British English and neighbor is American.
Spelling struggler 3:         This happened to me yesterday. I was trying to type 'beaurocratic' no
                                          beurocratic, no boreaucratic, no? Ok, red tape!

Spelling struggler 1:           Let's get to the online dictionary and spell beauro- whatever...
Spelling struggler 2:           Impossible! It says bureaucratic.
Struggler 3:                        If its boo- reou - cratic, why is it pronounced as beau- ro- cra-tic?

Spelling struggler 1:           This happens to me with 'believe'. For a long time I spelt it as 'beleive'.
Spelling struggler 2:            I can never write 'encyclopedia'.
Spelling struggler 1:            I always spell sandwich as sandwitch.
Spelling struggler 3:            I spell sandwich as sandwicth, if that makes you feel better.

Spelling struggler 2:            This happens with one more word! I forgot...something to do with the army!
Spelling struggler 4:            Leftinant (lieutenant)!

Spelling struggler 1, 2, 3:    Now how the hell do we spell that?

Cut Cut Cut!

The best place to sell magazines is the trains, since people travel for long hours. While a normal Femina/ Elle/ Cosmo/ Interiors magazine would cost a good 40- 60 bucks, the best place to buy them? The trains of course. You get them for 20, although they are last month's!

The last magazine I saw at my friend's place had the title cut. I asked her why, she said that now its against the law to sell magazines for less. See the smart skills of the hawkers- they cut up the title!

Amazes me every time people find out ways and means and loop-holes to get past some laws.

Mad over donuts

I guess donuts need to feature on my blog at least once with / without reference to context. This place 'Mad Over Donuts' at Carter Road, Bandra has the most amazing mouth-watering donuts of all kinds.
I usually get looney over the Bavarian one. Its got a dark chocolate layer on the top with a spider web design and its got white chocolate inside! Yummmyyyyylicious is not the word!

One time that I was dying for donuts, it was almost 11.00 pm and I got my mum to come along and she really thought I was insane to drive all the way to Bandra just for a donut (I refused to wait for the next day) and I didn't even know the way! I don't mind getting lost while trying to hunt for donuts! What's more, mum ensured I bought six of them, lest I dragged her all the way back again the next day!

Now you know who I'm going to take along every time I want a donut! :P :P

Smile please!

So, we had to go shopping for an event- Neena, Gayatri and me (Oh my! You gals are becoming a regular feature on my blog) went to a few shopping malls in Andheri? Malad? Either one. So, the two gals were hungry and we went to the food court to eat something. As we were going up the escalator, we spotted a photo booth which made sketches.
Silly that we are, we got all excited and got together to negotiate a price with the sales guy there. We were in our own masti and I think that guy just wanted us to go. Neena somehow managed to look taller than me ;) ;) ;). We were so excited we couldn't even wait for the thingy to print. It's not like we've never seen a photo booth before or like we've never been photographed...we are just plain MAD when we are all together!

Freaking out on toast!

One of the crazy days when Gayatri, Neena and I reached a creative (if you will) mind-block. So off we went for some fresh air and peanuts. So we had some peanuts and conversation and poor Gayatri was torn between the peanuts and some jam cheese sandwich. She finally settled down on a toast sandwitch. Obviously Neena and I werent  going to stand there watching. So we asked for some butter toast.

Then Gayatri goes,"Hey have you tried my cheese jam toast?"
"Ok. 2 butter toasts. 2 jam cheese toasts, please!"
That was the most delicious thing!
This one ended up being a sandwich binging session. Next time try the jam cheese toast when your brain is tired!

This post is a tribute to the jam- cheese sandwich. I think it deserves it glory.

Tricks

My mum just asked me to pick up some 'mithai' from her friend's place on my way to work yesterday.
So, it works like this yea, first you get to the building, look up and holler at the person you want to call.
So here I went, "Rupa auntieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!" Rupa Auntieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"
"Yes yes, hold on a minute!" 
She went and got the box of 'mithai' and put it in a cloth bag which was tied to a rope. She simply let the rope down below, I got the 'mithai' out of the bag and signaled to her to pull the rope back up!
I love such innovation! So much for not climbing three floors. I love it!

Fast or slow?

In Mumbai, life depends on local trains. People seem to own them! If you thought it was supposed to be 'public property', then you need to travel in one! Like if you get into to a Virar fast...I wouldn't be sure if you would come out alive, or even come out, for that matter!

This one time I had my laptop bag with me in the crowded train, they yelled at me for bringing a 'huge suitcase' along! "Throw it out!", they said. The other time I got into a similar train, I could barely even get off at Dadar...when I fell out, two bags (one in each hand) + my ipod headfones were stuck inside, not to mention the people yelling! I was glad to come out alive.

Also, the ladies compartment is the most noisiest and busiest, but its fun to observe as well. You can do your accessory shopping, grocery shopping, all of it on your way home! But don't forget to carry a deo in your bag. Always.

Tol mol ke bol

Indians are so used to bargaining (in ever aspect of life).

It's not unusual to bargain in local shops. Places like Linking Road and Fashion Street in Mumbai are popular for cheap bargains. But the trouble is, we apply these laws to everything...why should there be any exceptions? So when we go to a super mall, we forget that there is something called an MRP. Maximum Retail Price. Its NON- BARGAINABLE and we know it. But then we apply the fundaa of 'You don't ask, you don't get!"

I used to work in a retail store for pocket money after college, while studying in London and I was working with a lot of people from different nationalities. July is the time when loads of Indians travel to UK/ Europe. Thats the time when there are massive sales and the tourists shop like there's no tomorrow.
One time, a Punjabi family came over to speak to me. I had noticed them huddled in a corner and discussing among themselves as to who should come and talk to me. So, a lady with a black sweater and long plated hair came upto me and sweet talked me, got me answering questions about some of the beauty products in store and then her husband came up to me and said," Madamji...aap Indian ho?" I said, "Yes, of course". He goes, " Bus to ho gayi baat, aap bhi Indian, hum bhi Indian, give me 20% discount!" I was like, "Listen dude, I don't own this store and I can't give you a discount". He goes, "accha! to fir 10% de dijeye! Nahi? Chalo paanch kar do! Paanch madam, naa aapka na mera! Paanch mei round up kar do!" I refused and they were following me all over the store asking for a discount over a sale item (bubble bath). By this time I was helplessly looking for my fellow staffers who were really pitying me. One came to my rescue and said "Sorry sir, this piece is a sample  on display and we can't sell it to you anyway!"

Live to eat!

Indians are foodies by default and there are no exceptions. I was traveling by train on a holiday and while we were peacefully munching peanuts, there was a family sitting opposite us and they had more luggage than entire compartment's put together.
As soon as it was 10 o' clock, out came a flask.
Next came two jumbo-sized steel tiffins with four floors-complete with dal, rice, roti and pulses.
Next came out a plastic bag with home- made papad.
Wait, it doesn't end here.

Two tiny plastic boxes with chopped onions and sliced lemons (toppings for the papad).
Oops... I forgot to mention the three bottles of 'achaar' individually wrapped in white polythene bags. One bisleri bottle filled with orange fluid (probably Rasna orange).
One bag full of paper plates, another full of plastics cups and spoons.
A huge round Kelvinator water cooler kept under the seat, was pulled out to wash down all the food.

This event lasted for more than an hour.
I was watching, amused with all that was happening and then dozed off.
When i woke up, they were still eating! This time it was 'vadapav and samosas with mirchi'. We have this 'Anytime- anywhere' motto when it comes to food. Be it the beaches of Goa, or the palaces in Udaipur, or an SOTC trip to Europe. When it comes to food, our mentality is more or less like the Hutch pug in the Vodafone commercial...'wherever we go, our tiffin follows!"

Good exercise!

The only way you can open a cab door in Mumbai is by pushing it with your shoulder!

Sudden sparks of creativity

A sudden spark of creativity on a gloomy, dark, rainy day!